Question by kings4oasis1: Would compare this to a drug addict?
When I think about cutting the ties with my ex girlfriend, I almost relate it to a drug addict trying to withrdraw from a drug. Having high and low days fighting the urge to call,txt,or email. Anyone else ever feel this way after a breakup?

Best answer:

Answer by Brown Eyes E
i not sure about it but love is a drug addict which thats whats going on with u

Answer by tellen it like it is
There is a such thing as a love addiction. There is book about this very topic it is titled “Is it love or is it a addiction” by Brenda Schaeffer. Clinicians have found that an addiction compromises three elements: continuation of a behavior despite adverse physical or psychic consequences; obesession or preoccupation; and a feeling of being out of control. Two other elements that may or may not be present are tolerance ( progressively needing more of the object of addiction in order to get the same effect) and withdrawl symptoms. What these characteristics suggest is that what constitutes an addiction has more to do with how the object of addiction impacts a person’s life than it does witht he quanity of that object consumed or experienced. Through there remains a controversy amoung addiction professionals as to whether to accept the processes, or behavioral compulsions, as addictions, using current standards emphasizing the above behaviors, we can see how sex, love, and romance qualify as objects of addictive behavior. Several researchers have shown that the euphoria produced by process addictions is the same as that produced by drug or substance addictions. According to Harvey Milkman and Stanley Sunderworth, “We can become physically dependent on the experience of arousal, satiation or fantasie, independent of whether the capsule for transport is a substance or an activity.” Any activity, including love, that evokes any of these three sensatons arousal, satiation, and fantasie bring about alterations to the brain chemistry.
Our brains provide us naturally with the three sensations of pleasure as away to experience life more fully. These three sensations of pleasure as a way to experience life more fully. These three planes are controlled by hundreds of brain chemicals that we are only at the beginning stages of understanding. Without these chemicals we would not have the ability to appreciate our own human nature. PEA, for example, is a neurochemical that produces arousal states, it helps keep us alert and motivates us to action. Discomfort states, also produced by the activity of neurochemicals, helping us identify our basic human needs so that we seek satisfaction. Chemically controlled feelings of satiation then tell us we have had enough, and allow our bodies to go into homeostasis, or balance. Contentment, creative passion, fear, sexual excitation each has neurochemic alanalogues.
Addictions tap into one or more of these same pleasure planes or “feel good” chemicals. Some people crave arousal and exhilaration and get caught up in anything that is dangerous, risky, stimulating: compulsive gambling, illicit affairs, driving at high speeds, mountain climbing. Others opt for a rich fantasy life and soon get lost in it. Marijuana, psychedelics, mystical preoccupation, objects of romance and romance novels are all means of tapping into or enhancing our neurochemical “highs.” Still others feel “too much” and want a sedative to nunb the pain, stress, and fear. Endorphins the opiates of the mind are the neurochemicals that kill pain and reduce anxiety. People seeking sedation stimulate endorphins by compulsive food, alcohol, or opiate use, or by pursuing trance like altered states of consciousness. One very effective way to combine the benefits of one neurochemical a way to avoid pain, live out fantasies, and feel fully alive is to participate in a love relationship. The problem is, these benefits of our own brain chemistry can be addictive.
For our purposes, we will define addiction as a habit that has gone unconcious; a compulsive ritual that is no longer a choice; a psychological or physical attachment to the object, often characterized by withdrawal, or intensity of symptoms, when the object is removed. Focus on the object of addiction causes an interference with the normal social, occupational, recreational, emotional, spiritual, and physical aspects of a person’s life. There is a minimizing, or blatant denial, of the abuse or pain resulting from this focus, and there remains a continued involvement with the object in spite of negative consequences. Love addiction is a malignant outgrowth of our normal human inclination for arousal, fantasy, and satation.
Our needs are legitimate. Sometimes, however, when getting needs met takes time and attention away from other important life concerns, our needs become addictions. Words we often associate with addiction include obsessive, excessive, destructive, compulsive, habitual, attached, and dependent, And when you think about it, some of those words are also used to talk about love relationships. Does this mean love is a habit we have to kick? No, not at all. Our need to experience love is real our purpose is to identify and then keep unhealthy addictive elements out of our love lives and bring healthy love in. Love relationships are not black and white, either/or, but have all of these elements. Most love relationships seem to have the characteristics of both addictive love and healthy belonging. There are healthy and unhealthy dependencies. Peace this is tellin it!!

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