Question by : Am I being Insensitive to my Mothers Needs or is she reckless?
To save space I’m 21 live with my mother and can’t get a job to save my life. Especially since I don’t even have my GED. My Mother has a Masters, is currently in her dissertation year. And has decided to fall in love and marry a Convict. I don’t have my GED because of a horrible ex girlfriend that keeps coming into my life who urges me not to. That and when I was enrolled in school neither my teachers or my mother cared enough to give me things I needed. Getting a ride was like pulling teeth. And the metro system is so convoluted I’d get lost and miss my classes anyway. I’ve never been taught how to drive, also when I was enrolled my Mother kept promising me she’d help me learn fast enough. That it was okay to skip a day here or there. She’s a PhD candidate who works part time as a mentor in her University. But can’t seem to help me?. The reason she has a place is from me co-signing a loan. So she could stay in the doctoral program. If I hadn’t she would’ve lost the apartment in 4 months.

Not having a job she would’ve had to live with her mother and would’ve by extension lost the ability to get a job in the future.

She makes me out to be a creep to her friends at school. But the reason she doesn’t have a career is because from the ages of 10-12 me and my sister. Were working as paper couriers, she took a year and a half off working. Because and I quote: “I deserve it, don’t you think so?”.

It’s because she took that time off along with investing her life savings in pyramid scheme after pyramid scheme. We lost our house and kept moving from place to place. Every year until settling here. Which we almost lost several times from her gambling addiction. (I found out after signing.) Apart of the deal for giving her my signature was I could stay here for as long as I want. Until I’m 40, her words not mine.

This guy she’s talking to she’s only ever spoke to on the phone. The thing is I’m violent when people condescend to me and this guy does it like a second language. And if she allows him to pay rent he’ll be allowed to stay. Meaning if I fly off the handle I’ll be kicked out permanently.
Verbal agreement void.

I’m moving to my Aunts soon to finish school and get into a trade. But I have to ask myself the same thing my brother and sister did. If she was going to ill equip us on the promise of doing it later.
But tosses us out as soon as we’re inconvenient. Why did she have us? she could of put us up for adoption or kept us at our grandparents. To have a better life she openly admits that having us was a mistake and that she wishes she never did.
So Why?

Best answer:

Answer by Ruth
Hi
I don’t know why some mums do that put there kids down. I think it’s part of Having an addiction like gambling so they don’t have to blame themselves.
please don’t think it’s you

If your mum has a gambling problem you might have to tell the bank and sort out your half so you don’t get the blame and into debt if she forgets to pay.

Try not to be bitter it won’t affect her but it will you, and your sister
This book the 10 minute life coach by Fiona Harrold
I found really helpful my brother sent it to me
it shows you how to use motivation to change your life

Keep trying to be the best you can be
Never give up x

Answer by Ale
I read a touching story about a mother and her relationship with her daughter here: http://www.inform.websiteuniversity.org/Article/Mother—s-Day-Memories/139903
I hope we’d learn lessons from that short story.

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